Radikal (they/he) is a Queer, Trans and disabled sex and relationships educator, chronic illness advocate, and always-growing human. They hold a degree in sociology and work from a trauma-informed, intersectional framework that centers marginalized lived experiences. When he’s not working, you can find him devouring nonfiction books about sociopolitical issues and headbanging at death metal shows from his rollator. Follow his work on Instagram @QueeringSex
You Deserve Pleasure All Year, Not Just During Disability Pride Month
I’m a Disabled Slut, and the whole internet knows. As I’ve gotten sicker and learned that disability is not all loss and grief, this has become a term of endearment towards my disabled, polyamorous, kinky, queer self, as well as an invitation to celebrate my body as is.
QUICK LINKS:
What is a Disabled Slut?
“Disabled Sluthood” is a nebulous term, but to me, it evokes ethical non-monogamy, safer sex practices, and customizable, unmasked connections. The work I do as a sex and relationships educator and a chronic illness advocate centers the lived experiences of people with marginalized identities, and even I don’t have a singular definition of Disabled Sluthood. You know what this means? We get to create whatever our disabled body & minds desire!
Radikal Models the Special Edition Bed Restraints
Accessibility in the bedroom is foreign to a lot of non-disabled people or folks who don’t relate to disabled people in ways that require them to unlearn their preconceived notions. While many Sex Toys might not be marketed towards disabled people (sigh), many of them can be used to create access! I tried four products from Lovers that myself and the Lovers Team agreed would support my access needs as a disabled kinkster, and I am thrilled to share how many different ways I discovered these products can support disabled intimacy. Whether you’re a seasoned disabled slut, a newbie, a partner of a disabled person, or curious about accessibility and intimacy, these are for you.
The Best Sex Toys & Accessories for Disabled People
As a Neurodivergent person with sensory sensitivities, chronic pain, fatigue, and pelvic floor leakage, I was genuinely excited to try the Pivot Protector Sex Blanket. Featuring a velvety top layer that absorbs fluids and a waterproof inner layer that prevents moisture from soaking through to your sheets, this product is designed to keep your bedding or furniture clean during messy intimacy.
Pivot Protector, $120.00
I honestly expected it to crunch and feel like I was sitting in a puddle, but I was pleasantly surprised by how much liquid this thing can absorb! It’s also sizable–easily fitting two people and creating ease for disabled people who may require repositioning. This product is a great choice for folks who like it wet, live with incontinence, or just plain can’t or don’t want to change their sheets all the time, and you can throw it straight in the wash when you’re done!
Want to have even more messy fun? Add a Pivot Positioner Ramp to your collection. Whether you use it to prop up your upper body, boost your hips into the air, or brace your legs when they’re open (IYKYK), the Pivot Positioning Wedge is an easy-to-use, supportive access tool for folks with disabilities that affect their mobility, muscle strength, joint stability, or energy levels.
Pivot Position Ramp, $99.00
It has a removable, fluid resistant cover and its sleek black design blends in with the rest of your décor, but let’s be honest–what pillow do you own that has built-in loops for attaching cuffs? The Wedge is my new best friend, and helps me save on spoons so I can have more spicy time, more often.
Radikal Models the BodyDock Lap Strap
Speaking of saving spoons, the BodyDock Lap Strap makes queer disabled sex easier in countless ways. As a baby queer, I found the donning of a Strap-On Harness complicated even before my clumsiness and balance issues became apparent. Designed to be a facile approach to Strap-On sex, the Lap Strap is a fabulous option for folks who want a partner to ride them, even if they don’t have the mobility to wear and thrust with a traditional harness.
BodyDock Lap Strap, $64.00
The straps accommodate legs up to 30 inches around, and as a person who’s a size 18 in pants and carries most of their weight in their tummy and thighs, I have plenty of room to adjust the straps. The only issue I found was the buckles, which may cause problems for folks with dexterity limitations but can be worked around with some assistance. I’m a part-time wheelchair user with minimal mobility limitations, but the Lap Strap is easy enough to put on that wheelchair users with much less mobility could use it, which is a huge win for disabled sluts!
Radikal Models the Special Edition Bed Restraints & Pivot Protector Blanket
Finally, for the kinky or curious among us, the Special Edition Bed Restraints by Sportsheets offer an under-the-bed restraint system that’s easily concealable (if you value discretion), and it comes complete with four pleather cuffs and gold hardware. The cuffs are made with a belt-buckle-style closure, which isn’t very accessible due to the dexterity required, and they’re not very size-inclusive, but Lovers also sells Ankle Cuffs and Thigh Cuffs should you need more room.
Special Edition Bed Restraint System, $109.00
What I love about this product is its versatility, offering six anchor points instead of the classic four, which allows people with limited mobility to benefit from a customizable bondage experience. For instance, a person with a short stature can adapt the product to their height by attaching the cuffs to the middle and corner anchor points, as can people with cerebral palsy who often have very tense muscles, as well as anyone with mobility limitations or positional preferences. Each strap is individually adjustable, and the cuffs are easy-on, easy-off with clasps I can open single-handedly. Seeing these on my bed gets me hot–they're a 10/10 if you ask me.
Radikal Models the Special Edition Bed Restraints & Pivot Position Ramp
Clearly, Sex Toys and Sex Furniture don’t need to be marketed as accessible to be used as access tools, though I do believe the disabled community would adore more representation (shoutout to Lovers for hiring disabled people)! Disabled or not, these four products make for intimacy as hot as this summer heat wave. Stay hydrated and have a good and messy time! I hope you love these products as much as my kinky disabled ass did.
Further Readings:
How to Combat Ableism in the Bedroom: Lovers Stores
Canceling Sex Due to Chronic Illness or Disability: Lovers Stores
A Guide to the Best Gender Affirming Products: Lovers Stores
